The Fix-It Game

Practice desirable skills for interacting with and relating to others.
Objective:
Identify and describe that the ways in which something is said affects the way others feel.

Level: Grades l-5
Procedure:

1. Students to listen to the following statements one at a time and decide how the statements might make another person feel.
2. Students fix the statements by giving a more appropriate way to state the same message
3. Gimme some milk. (Ex. May I have some milk, please?)
4. Come on, stupid, you skipped my turn.
5. Hey, dumb-dumb, don’t you know that word?
6. Teacher, no way am I going to clean up that mess.
7. Mother, I’m not gonna take a bath in the middle of this T.V. program, and you can’t make me.
8. Get out of my way, fatso. I was here first.
9. I’m better than anyone else in this whole class, so I get to go first.
10. Discuss how people would react if you spoke to them in the above manner.
11. Talk about why it is important to use more appropriate language.

Comments:
Role playing activities may be developed from this procedure.
Evaluation:
Give students a card with a situation that is spoken in a negative manner. Have the students reverse to positive manner and role play in front of the class.

What has the Group Counseling done for You?

"What Has my Being in this Group Done for You?"

One group member will ask each person in the group, one at a time: "What has my being in this group done for you?" Once the member has received the answers, the next person in the circle asks each member the same question. It is helpful to have the question written on a piece of paper so the person on the "hot" seat can look at the question if needed. The paper is passed to each member of the group when it is his/her turn.

Simple Statements

1. One of these questions can be used to close any session:
* Who in the group have you discovered is most like you?
* Whom did you learn the most about today?
* Who do you think was the most honest today?
* Which person would you like to be more like?

Group members can also stand sideways in a circle and rub the back of the person in front of them as they answer the question.
2. Other options for simple statement closure are:
* Give a thought.
* Tell a joke.
* Repeat the serenity prayer.
* Stand in circle, hold hands, close eyes, and feel the friendship.
* Single Adjective Stroke

The group sits in a circle and the facilitator explains that members of the group will state a single positive adjective about each individual. One person will receive the praise from all the group members before the group begins with another person. The facilitator will write down the adjectives, then hand the sheet to the person after everyone has commented.

Group Hug

There are several kinds of group hugs. These are nice to do periodically through the group sessions. In one type of group hug, members stand in a circle with one arm around each neighbor's waist. Then the group takes one big step forward. Another type of hug is called the jelly roll hug. The group stands in a straight line, holding hands. Then the end person at one end walks clockwise into a tiny roll circle, while the end person at the other end walks counter-clockwise on the outside of the circle. The movement will stop as the members become a tight group resembling a jelly roll. The group will continue to hold hands while the center person maneuvers his/her way out of the roll, pulling the group along with him/her.

Letters

In this activity, group members write short notes to each member of the group to say good-bye. After a group member reads his/her notes, he/she can share at least one comment that meant a lot or surprised him/her.

Kiss the Ugly Frog

The facilitator sets a stool or upside-down bucket to represent a lily pad on one end of an oval space. Then the facilitator tells the group the story of the beautiful princess who was bored and very sad one day, so she decided to leave the castle and walk down by the lily ponds. As she was looking in the water and reflecting upon her life, a frog that was sitting on a lily pad begged her to kiss him. He said that no one ever valued him or recognized his beauty because he was a frog. He talk about how lonely and sad his life had been. After much persuasion, he convinced the princess to give him a kiss, and as she did he turned into a handsome prince. We, too, can feel like handsome princes and beautiful princesses if we receive the verbal "kisses" that let us know that we are valued and loved for who we are. After the story, the facilitator will ask for a volunteer to sit on the lily pad. After each group member gives the volunteer verbal kisses by expressing the positive things he/she has noticed about the person (the person is only allowed to say "thank you"), then that person chooses another person to sit on the lily pad. The activity continues until each group member has been "kissed."

Play Dough Sculpture

Group members are given a ball of child's clay on a paper plate and asked to create something with the clay that is symbolic of the changes they've made, the things they've learned, the way they feel, or whatever else may meet the needs of the group. After each person finishes his/her sculpture, he/she will talk about it. After all group members have shared their sculptures, they each will choose one person to give the sculpture to, and will explain why they want that person to have it. No group member may be given two pieces; consequently, group members must think about and process their relationships with each individual in the group. Group members may keep the gift.

Paper Plates Activity

In this activity, a paper plate or other paper is taped on each group member's back. The group members write positive thoughts about the member on the plate. Once everyone has written a comment or thought, the member takes the plate off his/her back and shares with the group one thought or idea that he/she especially liked or found surprising.

Sea Shell

For this activity, the facilitator holds a large sea shell in his/her hands and compares the spikes of the shell to his/her own manifestation of anger, or that of someone close to him/her. The facilitator will talk about how anger may alter his/her appearance, self-perception, or reception from others, what he/she has learned about him/herself, and what the lasting effects of the anger may be. Or, the facilitator can make the analogy and invite a group member to compare his/her own anger with the shell. The group member should hold the shell in his/her hands while speaking, and when finished should pass the shell to another group member.

Feeling Pictionary

The props for this game are index cards with one feeling per card (e.g., mad, sad, glad, scared, lonely, guilty, sorrowful, lonely, confused, relieved, frustrated, etc.). Each group member should take a card and draw a picture of the word on the board. When group members guess correctly, the facilitator will let each group member describe how he/she acts out that emotion in his/her life, what causes that emotion in his/her life, etc.

Smooth Rock

In this activity, the facilitator holds a large, completely smooth rock in his/her hands and talks about what kind of adversity in nature had to take place to smooth the natural jagged edges from this rock. He/she will then compare it to some of the types of problems group members struggle through, and asks the group to share some of the experiences that have smoothed their rough edges. He/she will then hand the rock to the first volunteer. When the group member is finished, he/she will hand the rock to another group member.

Dream Catcher

There is a Native American legend that tells how the Native Americans put a dream catcher (a round hoop with woven thread, like a web that leaves an opening in the center) over their babies' beds to protect the babies from their bad dreams. The web catches the bad dreams before they can reach the baby, and the good dreams make their way through the hole in the center. After the facilitator tells the legend, he/she should hand the dream catcher to a volunteer who will share what bad dreams he/she wants kept away, and what good dreams he/she hopes will reach him/her. Then the dream catcher is passed to another group member.

Trust Roll

For the trust roll, the group divides into small groups of 5-6 members. One group member will close his/her eyes, with legs together and hands crossed on his/her chest, holding on to both shoulders. The remaining group members stand shoulder to shoulder with hands up, palms forward. The center member lets him/herself fall forward and backward in the small group, while the group members keep him/her from falling through the circle. (It is important that all members understand the necessity of remaining trustworthy.) Then the group should process how it felt to trust, and how it felt to be responsible.

Trust Walk

For this activity, the facilitator creates an obstacle course with boards, blocks, string, or whatever he/she may have to challenge group members. He/she then explains to the group that the floor, or a major area, is poison and if they touch it they will "die." However, they cannot stay where they are because explosives have been hidden and will go off in six minutes. The safety area is on the other side of the room, hall, or field (the other side of the poison). Also, half the group members are blind and must be led through the troubled area to safety. After the time is up, the group will process how it felt to be blind and have to depend on other people, or how it felt to have a blind person's safety in their hands.

Large Ball Toss

FOR THIS ACTIVITY, THE FACILITATOR PROVIDES A LARGE BALL WITH MANY OPEN-ENDED STATEMENTS WRITTEN ON IT. THE FACILITATOR WILL TOSS THE BALL TO A GROUP MEMBER, AND THE MEMBER WILL SHARE HIS/HER RESPONSE TO THE FIRST STATEMENT HE/SHE READS AND THEN WILL TOSS THE BALL TO ANOTHER GROUP MEMBER.

Kleenex Toss

This activity works well to help an individual appropriately express his/her anger. A volunteer in the group shares what he/she is really angry about, or what makes him/her angry. As the volunteer begins talking, he/she is given a box of tissues and is encouraged to pull the tissues as the anger escalates. Then the whole group should process the individual's anger and look for solutions, resolve, understanding, etc.

Go-Rounds

Go-Rounds are sentence completion statements that each group member shares, one at a time, as they go around the circle. The statements begin light, easy, and safe. As the statements continue, they become deeper and more complex. The group member will discover his/her trust building as the other members share, and as he/she is willing to share more. Group members learn a great deal about each other, and the facilitator is able to quickly learn about each group member. Sample statements are:

* "My favorite color is . . . because . . ."
* "If I could be any animal I would be a . . . because . . ."
* "When I'm happy I . . ."
* "I wish my parents would . . ."
* "To get attention from others I . . ."
* "I cry when . . ."
* "People hurt me the most by . . . "
* "If I could change anything about myself it would be . . ."

Toy Memory

A bag full of toys (dolls, Slinkies, wooden spoons, balls, stuffed animals, cars, etc.) are spread on the floor in the middle of the circle. As each member spots a toy that brings up a childhood memory, he/she is encouraged to take and hold the toy. The group will then go around and share the memories in detail. After the group has finished sharing and if time permits, each member, one at a time, will give his/her toy to another person in the group who might benefit from the toy, the experience described, or the things the member has learned from the experience. One at a time, each member will share why he/she is giving this toy to the other person.

Using Pictures

There are several ways this activity can be done. The facilitator can have a set of several pictures, or several sets, that represent symbolic emotions (e.g., a rope with a knot tied at the end, a generic image of a person with his/her arms stretched out, a loaf of bread, a shaft of wheat, a ladder, a heart, a generic book, sun, etc.). The facilitator will ask each group member to choose three pictures that represent the way he/she is feeling. After all members have chosen their pictures, the group, in "Go-Round" format, will share the pictures they chose, and how and why these pictures apply to them. The pictures can be given a specific slant (e.g., how group members are feeling about school this year; how they are feeling about their families, how they are feeling this moment, week, or year, etc.). Some game cards also have symbolic pictures that represent moods, items, etc. These can be spread on the table and each group member can choose some that express how they feel, how they are, or what they believe.

Dealing with Feelings

Feeling activities can be used in all groups. They provide an opportunity for each group member to get in touch with his/her own feelings, understand the other group members better, risk during disclosure, and build trust.